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Henny Youngman Quotes


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Quotes by Henny Youngman

Showing 11-20 of 49 Quotes by Henny Youngman

This man used to go to school with his dog. Then they were separated. His dog graduated!

~Henny Youngman

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My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself.

~Henny Youngman

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Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.

~Henny Youngman

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A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.

~Henny Youngman

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I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.

~Henny Youngman

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I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him.

~Henny Youngman

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My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash.

~Henny Youngman

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When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

~Henny Youngman

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My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

~Henny Youngman

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A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well.

~Henny Youngman

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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Comedian

Born: March 16th, 1906

Died: February 24th, 1998

Links

Find Henny Youngman on Amazon

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