KeenBrain
KeenBrain
KeenBrain

Steven Wright Quotes


Share this page on

Quotes by Steven Wright

Showing 11-20 of 181 Quotes by Steven Wright

What a nice night for an evening.

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time... I think I’ve forgotten this before.

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat.'

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


All those who believe in psychokinesis - raise my hand.

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?

~Steven Wright

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Comedian

Born: December 6th, 1955

Links

Find Steven Wright on Amazon

Related Authors

Colleen Ballinger
Jack Benny
Frank Caliendo
Adam Devine
Marc Evan Jackson
Vicki Lawrence
Seth Meyers
Niecy Nash
Caroline Rhea
Phoebe Robinson

Popular Authors

P. T. Barnum Kevin Gates Jeremy Irons William James Jack Kerouac John Mccain Margaret Mead Oscar Wilde

Change your beliefs...change your life.

Get a related quote or insight every day.

(it's 100% free)

Follow Us On

Today's Birthdays

1882 - James Joyce

1905 - Ayn Rand

1745 - Hannah More

1754 - Charles Maurice De Talleyrand

1843 - Knute Nelson

1859 - Havelock Ellis

1864 - Margot Asquith

1874 - Ernest Shackleton

1875 - Fritz Kreisler

1882 - James Stephens

Birthdays on February 2nd
All Birthdays

Popular Topics

Government Knowledge Memorial Day Parenting Society Technology Thankful Trust