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Mitch Hedberg Quotes


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Quotes by Mitch Hedberg

Showing 21-30 of 59 Quotes by Mitch Hedberg

If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be messed-up.

~Mitch Hedberg

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A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.

~Mitch Hedberg

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I would imagine that if you could understand Morse code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy.

~Mitch Hedberg

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My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said 'No, but I want a regular banana later, so... yeah.'

~Mitch Hedberg

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I think foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs.

~Mitch Hedberg

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I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.

~Mitch Hedberg

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I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later.

~Mitch Hedberg

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This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty.

~Mitch Hedberg

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I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

~Mitch Hedberg

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I know a lot about cars, man. I can look at any car's headlights and tell you exactly which way it's coming.

~Mitch Hedberg

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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Comedian

Born: February 24th, 1968

Died: March 30th, 2005

Links

Find Mitch Hedberg on Amazon

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