KeenBrain
KeenBrain
KeenBrain

Jay Leno Quotes


Share this page on

Quotes by Jay Leno

Showing 1-10 of 40 Quotes by Jay Leno

I didn't realize it was October until I saw the Chicago Cubs choking.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


The University of Nebraska says that elderly people that drink beer or wine at least four times a week have the highest bone density. They need it - they're the ones falling down the most.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


You cannot be mad at somebody who makes you laugh... it's as simple as that.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Politics is just show business for ugly people.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


The Washington Bullets are changing their name. They don't want their team to be associated with crime. From now on, they'll just be known as the Bullets.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


If I have one advantage, it's that I will try to work harder than the next guy.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Major league baseball has asked its players to stop tossing baseballs into the stands during games, because they say fans fight over them and they get hurt. In fact, the Florida Marlins said that's why they never hit any home runs. It's a safety issue.

~Jay Leno

Topics: None

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Comedian

Born: April 28th, 1950

Links

Find Jay Leno on Amazon

Related Authors

George Carlin
Rodney Dangerfield
W. C. Fields
Mitch Hedberg
Groucho Marx
P. J. O'Rourke
Robin Williams
Steven Wright

Popular Authors

Ansel Adams H. L. Mencken George Orwell Blaise Pascal John D. Rockefeller Will Smith Unknown Elie Wiesel

Change your beliefs...change your life.

Get a related quote or insight every day.

(it's 100% free)

Follow Us On

Today's Birthdays

1931 - Desmond Tutu

1952 - Vladimir Putin

1573 - William Laud

1576 - John Marston

1727 - William Samuel Johnson

1746 - William Billings

1810 - Henry Alford

1849 - James Whitcomb Riley

1854 - Christiaan Rudolf De Wet

1879 - Joe Hill

Birthdays on October 7th
All Birthdays

Popular Topics

Design Easter Gardening God Jealousy Money Moving On Patriotism