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George Carlin Quotes


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Quotes by George Carlin

Showing 1-10 of 53 Quotes by George Carlin

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

~George Carlin

Topics: Become Confused Evil Forces House May Way Your

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Weather forecast for tonight: dark.

~George Carlin

Topics: Dark Forecast Tonight Weather

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There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.

~George Carlin

Topics: Moon Nights Only Silent Wolves

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Electricity is really just organized lightning.

~George Carlin

Topics: Electricity Just Lightning Organized Really

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Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.

~George Carlin

Topics: Back Cause Circus Got Just Left Mean Monkey Off Town You Your

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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

~George Carlin

Topics: Belief Die Gets Goes Roof Soul Stuck Up You Your

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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

~George Carlin

Topics: Anybody Anyone Driving Ever Faster Going Idiot Maniac Noticed Slower Than You

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Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.

~George Carlin

Topics: Cynical Disappointed Every Idealist Inside Person

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Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

~George Carlin

Topics: Pet Petty Sweat Sweaty Things

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The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.

~George Carlin

Topics: Close Done Enough Existence Fire Get Job Just Know Over People Proves Said Set Some Someone Somewhere Themselves Those Time Very Want You

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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Comedian

Born: May 12th, 1937

Died: June 22nd, 2008

Links

Find George Carlin on Amazon

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