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Chelsea Handler Quotes


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Quotes by Chelsea Handler

Showing 91-100 of 109 Quotes by Chelsea Handler

Personally, I'd have a baby just for the epidural.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Baby Just Personally

Keywords: None


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Can you imagine peaking as a teen? I think if you peak in high school, there's a problem. That's what my sister always said: 'Don't worry, you'll peak later.'

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Always High High School Imagine Later Peak Problem Said School Sister Teen Think Worry You I Think

Keywords: None


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I've always had a problem with authority. That's why I had to be my own boss.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Always Authority Boss Had My Own Own Problem Why

Keywords: None


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The next step for me is not 'The Tonight Show.' That's a job for Jimmy Fallon. I'm way too divisive for a show like that.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Divisive Jimmy Job Like Me Next Next Step Show Step Tonight Tonight Show Too Way

Keywords: None


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I want to educate people and deliver news that isn't just surrounded by Charlie Sheen. I'd like to be able to do the serious stuff in conjunction with the comedy.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Able Charlie Comedy Deliver Educate Just Like News People Serious Sheen Stuff Surrounded Want

Keywords: None


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I wanted to be famous. It's embarrassing to admit, but I came out to L.A. thinking it would happen in no time. I thought, 'Once they see me, they'll be so glad I came.' I always had a ridiculous amount of self-confidence about what was going to happen to me.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: About Admit Always Amount Came Embarrassing Famous Glad Going Had Happen Me No Time Once Out Ridiculous See Self-Confidence Thinking Thought Time Wanted Would I Came

Keywords: None


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Once you've achieved success, and you're making decisions that are working, I don't understand why anyone would be second-guessing themselves.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Achieved Anyone Decisions Making Making Decisions Once Success Themselves Understand Why Working Would You

Keywords: None


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I like the minute when I can get off the stage and go home, and I know I've done a good job.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Done Get Go Go Home Good Good Job Home Job Know Like Minute Off Stage I Can

Keywords: None


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I have severe ADD, and I'm constantly looking to amuse myself.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Add Amuse Constantly Looking Myself Severe

Keywords: None


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In a relationship, the sum of your parts should equal more than just you by yourself. He needs to bring something new and different to the table to up the ante.

~Chelsea Handler

Topics: Bring Different Equal He Just More Needs New Parts Relationship Should Something Something New Sum Table Than Up You Your Yourself

Keywords: None


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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Comedian

Born: February 25th, 1975

Links

Find Chelsea Handler on Amazon

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