KeenBrain
KeenBrain
KeenBrain

Fred Allen Quotes


Share this page on

Quotes by Fred Allen

Showing 41-50 of 50 Quotes by Fred Allen

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference.

~Fred Allen

Topics: Advertising Advertising Agency Agency Been Bit Conference Desk Executive Exposed Forms Fungus Vice-President

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it.

~Fred Allen

Topics: About Anything Humor Know

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


California is a great place to live if you're an orange.

~Fred Allen

Topics: California Great Great Place Live Orange Place You

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk; today we have small men enjoying big talk.

~Fred Allen

Topics: Big Days Enjoying Had Johnson Men Samuel Small Small Talk Talk Today

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


If I could get my membership fee back, I'd resign from the human race.

~Fred Allen

Topics: Back Could Fee Get Human Human Race If I Could Membership Race Resign

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.

~Fred Allen

Topics: Any Children Except Father Hand His Never Raised Self-Defense

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


My uncle is a Southern planter. He's an undertaker in Alabama.

~Fred Allen

Topics: Alabama He Planter Southern Uncle Undertaker

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Television is the triumph of machine over people.

~Fred Allen

Topics: Machine Over People Television Triumph

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy who is about to look into a gas tank with a lighted match.

~Fred Allen

Topics: About Actor Boy Expectancy Fleeting Gas His Life Life Expectancy Lighted Look Match Popularity Small Success Tank Who

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.

~Fred Allen

Topics: Each Hollywood Iowa Mistake Other People Place Stars Where

Keywords: None


Suggest an Edit


Cite the source


Save to Favorites


Collect


Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Comedian

Born: May 31st, 1894

Died: March 17th, 1956

Links

Find Fred Allen on Amazon

Related Authors

George Carlin
Rodney Dangerfield
W. C. Fields
Mitch Hedberg
Groucho Marx
P. J. O'Rourke
Robin Williams
Steven Wright

Popular Authors

Albert Einstein Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe Douglas Macarthur Danny Meyer Nas Harriet Tubman John Wayne Walt Whitman

Change your beliefs...change your life.

Get a related quote or insight every day.

(it's 100% free)

Follow Us On

Today's Birthdays

1890 - H. P. Lovecraft

1601 - Pierre De Fermat

1833 - Benjamin Harrison

1881 - Edgar Guest

1886 - Paul Tillich

1892 - George Aiken

1901 - Salvatore Quasimodo

1907 - Shirley Booth

1908 - Al Lopez

1917 - Terry Sanford

Birthdays on August 20th
All Birthdays

Popular Topics

Computers Environmental Experience Learning Money Nature Patience Technology