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Erma Bombeck Quotes


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Quotes by Erma Bombeck

Showing 1-10 of 77 Quotes by Erma Bombeck

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Comedy Humor Hurt Laughter Line Pain Separates Thin Tragedy

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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Died Doctor Go Never Office Plants Whose

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Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Anyone Birth Car Given Lend Never Whom You Your

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A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Grandmother Halloween Know Pretends She Who You

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Never have more children than you have car windows.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Car Children More Never Than Windows You

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Dreams have only one owner at a time. That's why dreamers are lonely.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Dreamers Dreams Lonely Only Owner Time Why

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For years my wedding ring has done its job. It has led me not into temptation. It has reminded my husband numerous times at parties that it's time to go home. It has been a source of relief to a dinner companion. It has been a status symbol in the maternity ward.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Been Companion Dinner Done Go Go Home Home Husband Job Led Maternity Me Numerous Parties Relief Reminded Ring Source Status Symbol Temptation Time Times Ward Wedding Wedding Ring Years

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Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Gift Giving Guilt Keeps

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When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'.

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Before Bit Could End Everything Gave God Hope Left Life Me My Life Say Single Stand Talent Used Would You

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My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?

~Erma Bombeck

Topics: Block Cares Catch Door Else Fire Housework Item Multiply Refrigerator Should Smell Theory Why You

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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Journalist

Born: February 21st, 1927

Died: April 22nd, 1996

Links

Find Erma Bombeck on Amazon

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