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Dave Barry Quotes


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Quotes by Dave Barry

Showing 61-70 of 83 Quotes by Dave Barry

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look like giant thumbs.

~Dave Barry

Topics: African-American Cool Giant Heads Like Look Men Shave Simple Simple Truth Thumbs Truth Truth Is Whereas White

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The nuclear generator of brain sludge is television.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Brain Generator Nuclear Television

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The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Anybody Conduct Could Doubt Human Live Major Notice Parties Prime Sacrifices Time Would

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Skiers view snowboarders as a menace; snowboarders view skiers as Elmer Fudd.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Menace View

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Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading my column.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Chance Column Crazy Declining Fact Good Good Chance In Fact Like Newspaper Nobody Readership Reading

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Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

~Dave Barry

Topics: About Advice Defined Listen Modern Old Person Remembers Teenager Who Your

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American consumers have no problem with carcinogens, but they will not purchase any product, including floor wax, that has fat in it.

~Dave Barry

Topics: American Any Consumers Fat Floor Including No Problem Problem Product Purchase Wax Will

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It was Public Art, defined as art that is purchased by experts who are not spending their own personal money.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Art Defined Experts Money Own Personal Public Purchased Spending Who

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The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Closely Follow Generally Here Me Place Problem Sports Take The Problem With Winter

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Violence and smut are of course everywhere on the airwaves. You cannot turn on your television without seeing them, although sometimes you have to hunt around.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Airwaves Although Around Cannot Course Everywhere Hunt Seeing Sometimes Television Them Turn Violence Without You Your

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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Journalist

Born: July 3rd, 1947

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