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Dave Barry Quotes


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Quotes by Dave Barry

Showing 51-60 of 83 Quotes by Dave Barry

The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Fish Kind Only Seafood Stick Totally Trust

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Eugene is located in western Oregon, approximately 278 billion miles from anything.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Anything Approximately Billion Located Miles Oregon Western

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We idolized the Beatles, except for those of us who idolized the Rolling Stones, who in those days still had many of their original teeth.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Beatles Days Except Had Idolized Many Original Rolling Rolling Stones Still Stones Teeth Those Us Who

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I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Afford Become Believe Cannot Children College Educated Encourage Get Good Must Our Parents We Cannot I Believe I Believe That

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Have you noticed that whatever sport you're trying to learn, some earnest person is always telling you to keep your knees bent?

~Dave Barry

Topics: Always Bent Earnest Keep Knees Learn Noticed Person Some Sport Telling Trying Whatever You Your

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People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Almost Never People Religious Religious Views Share Them Views Want Who You Yours

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What may seem depressing or even tragic to one person may seem like an absolute scream to another person, especially if he has had between four and seven beers.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Absolute Another Between Depressing Even Four Had He Like May Person Scream Seem Seven Tragic

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In 1765, Parliament passed the Stamp Act, which, as any American high school student can tell you, was an act that apparently had something to do with stamps.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Act American Any Apparently Had High High School Parliament Passed School Something Stamp Stamps Student Tell Which You

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The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management skills of celery.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Again Basically Democrats Management Nicer People Seem Skills Time

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Guys are simple... women are not simple and they always assume that men must be just as complicated as they are, only way more mysterious. The whole point is guys are not thinking much. They are just what they appear to be. Tragically.

~Dave Barry

Topics: Always Appear Assume Complicated Guys Just Men More Much Must Mysterious Only Point Simple Thinking Tragically Way Whole Women Women Are

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Biography

Nationality: American

Type: Journalist

Born: July 3rd, 1947

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